Living in a Monet World

Cliff walk at Pourville by Claude Monet

The past six days have been some challenging ones for me! After many years of debate I made the decision to have my vision surgically corrected. I’ve worn glasses (or contacts) over 50 years now . I suppose I could have waited another 15-20 years for cataract surgery to get them corrected but it just seemed like now was the time. I was not a candidate for the Lasik procedure that you normally hear about but instead had PRK. (Here’s a link that explains what that involves: PRK info) Ever the optimist, even knowing that the recovery period is longer, I was sure I would be back to my normal routine quickly. Instead I am in the middle of a healing process that may take weeks…in some cases months…to complete itself. In the meantime I can see but it’s like the world is slightly smudged and out of focus. The best comparison (especially as an artist) I can come up with is living in a painting by Monet. You can tell exactly what is there, yet it’s just not sharply displayed.  I’ve had to cancel several activities I was sure I’d be up to doing and I’ve been relying on help from others – something I’ve never been very good at! On my home turf I do well, driving solo I’ve not been brave enough to attempt – although that is on my list for tomorrow. I’m past the point of wanted to keep my eyes closed all the time, no longer taking pain meds or numbing my eyes with drops but I’ve got a pair of dark sunglasses perched on top of my head at all time, even indoors, for when the light is just too bright to deal with. Creating art hasn’t been on the radar yet. I’m hoping that will be soon though, In the meantime I can do some cleaning & organizing and be prepared for when the creative times return! Patience has never come easily to me (does it to anyone?) so this is just another way to help me embrace it. Perhaps I’ll use these quieter days for posting more on my blog now that I can kind of see the screen!



Tiny miracles

It was a cold winter day today, nothing unusual in that.  Freezing rain, wind, snow.  Big snow…at least as far as the flake size, not the tiny light little flakes that float through the air but the big chunky kind you feel when they hit your skin. Almost like ice, but not quite.  The kind that stays on you for a while, glistening before they slowly melt.  For some reason today I took extra notice of them, bright white against my black coat sleeve instead of impatiently brushing them off.  As I looked more closely at the tiny flecks I noticed the perfection of each little flake, like minature starbursts exploding in random patterns on my clothes and skin.  It reminded me of the images of snow that you see in advertising (or maybe cartoons?), perfectly formed, symetric, each similar yet each unique.  Why had I never seen each little detail as I did today?  I knew, with my head, my mind, that snowflakes were created to look like that. But the detailed images that I had seen in books or on television, they were viewed with a microscope, weren’t they?  I had always though so.  Had I never looked closely at them?  Thinking my own eyes weren’t capable did I never even try to see the details?  Or was today one of those rare, special days with magical snowflakes and extraordinary vision?  Maybe it was all of those things put together.  Whatever it was it will stick with me for a while, reminding me to have the awareness and faith that it takes to see the tiny miracles that surround me each day.